After all of my social and official duties towards sultan were over I went to the 'ICTC' and met the Doctor. I told her the fate of Sultan. She was very much sorry about that. I asked her that I was pregnant and as was HIV positive, were there any legal bindings on me to give birth to my baby or not. She told me that the confidentiality was the primary object of 'ICTC' . She told me about the HIV status of Sultan only after he gave consent for it. There were no legal bindings even over him to tell his wife about his HIV status . At least we the health providers keep it confidential. She told me that it was up to me to go for a baby or not .Till date HIV positives have full rights to go for a baby or not . She told me HIV Positive mothers could transmit HIV infection to their babies during Pregnancy, during labour or delivery and via breast milk. There are medicines which can reduce this risk. But even after proper prophylaxis there were chances of mother to child transmission. If you opt for a baby to be delivered you have to take extra calories in your diet through out your pregnancy. During child birth also it was not mandatory that HIV Positive mothers should disclose their status to the doctor but such disclosures might save the life of mother and child or might be good to stop mother to child HIV transmission. If HIV mothers gave birth to a child there are up to 20 percent chances of Mother to child HIV transmission and up to 20 percent HIV negative baby borne to HIV positive mothers might get it through breast feeding of their mothers. Medicines given to Mother during pregnancy and to baby just after birth can reduce this up to almost 2 percent chances. If HIV positive mother selected no breast feeding she had to opt AFASS criteria for baby feeding, the AFASS criteria was to protect child from getting opportunistic infections as these infections might kill more new born babies than the number of babies getting HIV infections through breast milk.If HIV positive mothers opted for breast feeding it should be a total breast feeding, no milk substitute allowed for six months then abrupt stop of breast feeding is recommended. HIV positive mothers during pregnancy and HIV positive new born should receive the same vaccines as if they were HIV negative.
I thanks to the doctor for the information given and visited my mothers home. She was still not knowing my status of HIV or about my pregnancy. She formally condole the death of Sultan and insisted that I should remarry now. Then I told her that I was HIV positive and pregnant too.She was shocked to listen this. She started weeping. I was the main cause of her sorrows. I never gave ears to her advise. I could not stay there very long.I returned home.
Then was the time when I had to take firm decisions. But every decision of me regarding my life had been a catastrophe for me.Sultan and each person known to me opposed my decision to be pregnant. But I went for Pregnancy. HIV virus showed no curtsy to me . It infected me and was in my blood for ever. Should I go for Abortion? But why? I could adopt a child when I was HIV negative. I insisted to have a child of Sultan no matter if I also got infection of HIV. What was the difference in the situation now? What I wanted was inside me.But this virus would not spare my baby too .How my baby after birth could with stand the disease and the stigmas associated with it? Then once again I collected all my courage and made a final decision that I would struggle against this cruel virus. I would give birth to my child .The last remains of Sultan had every right to flourish . I would take every necessary medicine available on the earth . My baby would see the world. Let me prove that this virus could not be bigger than human efforts. I would give birth to my baby and would also breast fed him. And only this child would tell the world that the love story of his parent was not an inch lesser than the story of Laila -Majnu.
I took every precaution and medication during the pregnancy which doctors advised me. I had disclosed my status to the Obstetrician . Maa visited often but she was not happy with me at all. My diet was increased .I was getting 600 extra calories per day.
I gave birth to a son. Doctor gave my son a prophylactic dose of syrup Nevirapine.I fed him COLOSTRUM [first breast milk of mother after delivery]. I was anxious to know the HIV status of my son. But the doctor told me that it was not possible as baby was having mother's antibodies against HIV. Doctors had also councelled me about the health of my breasts and oral hygiene of baby's oral cavity.Doctors also councelled me about AFASS criteria if I did not feed my baby.
The baby grew like anything. He was healthier than the other babies of his age. After six months I stopped breast feeding abruptly as advised by doctors.
At the age of about one year HIV test of my son was done.He was HIV negative. That day I could not prevent my tears to flow out of my eyes . After all I had defeated that dreaded Virus.This was a victory of human efforts over HIV .
Today my son is five years old and still I am not taking anti retro viral treatment as my CD4 count is over five hundred. Doctors of ICTC are saying that I can Live up-to fifteen more years and I have taken another oath that if I will be alive up to the marriage of my son I will marry him with an HIV Positive girl off-course yes if she got it accidentally, as Sultan got it. Till than I have to remain alive whatsoever may be the circumstances.I will struggle to see that happen. Thus her struggle starts........
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