Today I remember When for the first time I told my mother that sultan was my colleague, was earning more than me, was tall and of charming personality but he was not having a close relative and was of different religion my mother's first reaction was of great surprise and she advised me never to meet him again and not to disclose it to my father. But it was the question of my life and I and Sultan were of the view that religion was a very personal thing and religious beliefs could remain intact even after marriage.
My mother told to my father same day. My father also advised me about the pros and cons of this inter religious marriage and tried his best to convince me not to do that blunder. I and sultan did a very detailed discussion over it and ultimately did court-marriage with an understanding that we would remain inseparable in future even under the oddest circumstances . Sultan was not having a close relative and my parent and relatives did not appear over the occasion.
As we had planned we avoid pregnancy using condom and safe period up-to two years of our marriage. These two years were the best years in my life. We enjoyed every microsecond of these two years. Our different religions could not dent our family affairs. My parent and other relatives never visited our home. My mother used to ring me occasionally, I always tried to make my relations normal with my parents and visited several times to my parent's home but my parent never welcomed me and Sultan.
But I was happy with Sultan and never expected more from my parent and other relatives.We were thankful to God that he gave us so beautiful life. Every thing was O.K. in my life.
The problem began when Sultan started loosing weight and started early fatigue. One of our family friend was a qualified Doctor and he gave some medicines to Sultan but Sultan continued to loose weight.
One day Doctor visited our home and advised to visit both of us to a nearby ICTC-[integrated counselling and test center for HIV and AIDS]. We both went there. We told the counsellor about the problem of Sultan. Counsellor asked some questions and sent us to the doctors chamber.
Doctor inquired in detail about Sultan's problem and asked him about-
1. His extra marital or pre-marital sexual relations.
2. Took history of any blood transfusion in previous five years
3. Any habit of taking Intra venous drugs and sharing needles in doing so.
Sultan told that once in a road accident his nasal Bone was fractured and he was bleeding profusely. He was taken to a nearby hospital and was asked for one unit of blood transfusion. As he was not having a close relative to give him blood he has to purchase it from a professional blood donor. This was an event of about five years back. Sultan told the Doctor that he was not having any Pre-marital or extra marital relation.
After listening carefully to Sultan Doctor said that Sultan needed an HIV test to be done and also counselled about post test scenario. Sultan was ready for test. Doctor took an "Informed Consent" for HIV test and blood sample of Sultan was taken. We were asked to come next day for report of test.
Rest of the day was a very long day to me. Did Sultan has HIV infection? Was he having extramarital relations or was having some[Homosexual or Heterosexual] type of relations? Was my decisions to marry him correct? If he turned to be HIV positive should I convey it to my parent? If he is HIV positive should I continue my sexual relations with him? He would certainly transmit this dreaded infection to me or could had already done it.
But we revolted and married against the will of our parents and society. What will be of the promises and vows we took together? Might a virus of size 120 nm make us separate? Was this virus stronger than the society?
I was restless. I could not do routine work that day. By the night I was sure that he already had transmitted that infection to me. And this was the reason that I was feeling so much of tiredness that movement.
The other part of brain was arguing that I should wait the result to come. I should not be so cruel even to think against Sultan. After all he was my Love. He was my choice. We vowed to remain inseparable in every circumstances whatsoever they might be. Was it true that he was transfused blood ? But he had no marks of injuries! He never told me about the incidence.What will be my future if he turned to be HIV positive. Had I also had become HIV positive? HEY RAM what should I do?
to be continued.......
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